Strangers Drowning - Larissa MacFarquhar

Strangers Drowning

Larissa MacFarquhar

出版社

Penguin Press

出版时间

2015-09-29

ISBN

9781594204333

评分

★★★★★
书籍介绍
What does it mean to devote yourself wholly to helping others? In Strangers Drowning, Larissa MacFarquhar seeks out people living lives of extreme ethical commitment and tells their deeply intimate stories; their stubborn integrity and their compromises; their bravery and their recklessness; their joys and defeats and wrenching dilemmas. A couple adopts two children in distress. But then they think: If they can change two lives, why not four? Or ten? They adopt twenty. But how do they weigh the needs of unknown children in distress against the needs of the children they already have? Another couple founds a leprosy colony in the wilderness in India, living in huts with no walls, knowing that their two small children may contract leprosy or be eaten by panthers. The children survive. But what if they hadn’t? How would their parents’ risk have been judged? A woman believes that if she spends money on herself, rather than donate it to buy life-saving medicine, then she’s responsible for the deaths that result. She lives on a fraction of her income, but wonders: when is compromise self-indulgence and when is it essential? We honor such generosity and high ideals; but when we call people do-gooders there is skepticism in it, even hostility. Why do moral people make us uneasy? Between her stories, MacFarquhar threads a lively history of the literature, philosophy, social science, and self-help that have contributed to a deep suspicion of do-gooders in Western culture. Through its sympathetic and beautifully vivid storytelling, Strangers Drowning confronts us with fundamental questions about what it means to be human. In a world of strangers drowning in need, how much should we help, and how much can we help? Is it right to care for strangers even at the expense of those we are closest to? Moving and provocative, Strangers Drowning challenges us to think about what we value most, and why.
AI导读
核心看点
  • 探讨极端利他主义者的道德困境与心理代价
  • 剖析行善是出于无私还是另一种形式的自私
  • 反思普通人在道德义务上的边界与责任限度
适合谁读
  • 对伦理学、道德哲学及人性本质感兴趣的读者
  • 从事公益、慈善或助人行业,常感内耗的专业人士
  • 在利他与自保、家庭与陌生人间挣扎的普通人
读前提醒
  • 书中案例极具冲击力,可能引发强烈不适与焦虑
  • 作者保持中立,不急于给出标准答案,需独立思考
  • 避免将极端案例直接套用于日常生活决策
读者共识
  • 文笔极佳,阅读体验流畅,兼具理性与感性深度
  • 引发对‘圣母’行为的重新审视,不再简单批判
  • 让人意识到道德并非最高法庭,生活本身更重要

本导读基于书籍简介、目录、原文摘录、短评和书评生成,不等同于全文精读。

精彩摘录
  • "将一个人奉为圣人其实是一种切割和疏远,暗含的意思是,作为普通人的我无须像您那样行事。称赞其实只是伪装的借口罢了。"
  • "生物学家们用亲缘选择理论(帮助你的亲属是繁殖自己基因的一种好办法)和互利利他主义(帮助他人,尤其是非亲属,是有益的,因为如果你已经帮助过他们,或者他们知道你是个乐于助人的人,人们更可能给你帮助)来解释利他主义。换句话说,利他主义在生物学的层面只是另一种形式的自私——一种确保自我生存的更精明的手段。"
  • "“行善者”这个词常常含有贬义。它可能意味着一种病态或入侵式的人格,这样的人总是好心办坏事。它也可能意味着过度热心、一本正经、自以为是,热衷于评判他人。"
  • "从那时起,他开始通过考虑结果而非原则来判定某件事是否符合道德。"
  • "假设你并不渴望成为一名行善者,道德又能要求你多少?你的生活是你自己的,你按照自己喜欢的方式过日子就好,还是说你对其他人有所亏欠?如果确实有所亏欠,那么是多少?这里的道德问题不是质的问题:我该怎么办?而是量的问题:什么时候可以停下来?"
  • "某些瞬间让我们懂得了人类相互连接的价值:如果一个人能够忍受自己的痛苦,那么他也会尊重他人的痛苦。因此,简单但又抽象地说,我们能够帮助彼此摆脱痛苦。"
  • "沃尔夫认为,如果成为高尚的行善者的理想并不是我们真正追求的,比如我们感到,这些人由于自身的冷淡和克制而缺乏某些关键的人类特质,换句话说,如果我们相信道德的理想状态并非人的理想状态,那么我们就应该修正我们对道德在生活中的地位的认识。道德不应该是人类价值体系中超越一切的最高法庭。"
  • "他意识到,有道德并不意味着纯粹,而是关心痛苦。从那时起,他开始通过考虑结果而非原则来判定某件事是否符合道德。是的,通常意义上诚实更好,但当安妮·弗兰克7躲在你的屋子里而纳粹军官正在门口时,撒谎则是更好的。"
作者简介
Larissa MacFarquhar has been a staff writer at The New Yorker since 1998. Her subjects have included John Ashbery, Barack Obama, and Noam Chomsky, among many others. Previously she was a senior editor at Lingua Franca and an advisory editor at The Paris Review. MacFarquhar lives in New York.
用户评论
此书几乎是“不留痕迹得好读”,读者完全不会注意到作者下了什么功夫的那种通顺和阅读舒适感。而书里的内容很惊人,看着看着会让人的喜怒哀乐稍微跳出一下自我小世界的现实。读完,感受很震撼。我想这也是因为作者的写作角度很中肯。对于一个这样题材,如何才能做到感性却并不煽情,理性但无过度解析?这本书似乎是打开了一些新问题,但并不急于要给予解答。 要不是读到这样一本书,可能我永远不会知道这样的人的存在。理想、思想、实践、世界、贫穷、富有。这些都是遥远的事情,突然被一本书拉近了。
理性看待圣母(do-gooders)现象.
Neutral, fascinating, thought-provoking
写得非常好 看的时候让人很不舒服但还想一直看下去 就像推荐语说的 if the book does not provoke or unsettle you, you may not have a pulse. 关于give and receive的讨论非常好 案例也都 选得刚刚好 可能感想还是 don't go to any extremes..吧
看看
爛人或保持沈默的人或漠不關心的人會有self-reflection作用,但那類型的人會看這種書才怪 Everytime stuck at toxic relationship definitely should read this book. But“extreme do-gooder"就像是在罵我,事實上也是在罵我,忍受自己的痛苦尊重大家的痛苦,並期望可以在痛苦中成長或擺脫這種用個人準則作為standard去要求他人,最好的情況是對方完全順我意 罵得好(Delightful as fuck)
非常不喜欢作者反复把do-gooders类比成wartime soldiers 前者是自发的理性的 后者是服从和反理性 这本书议题宏大 然而案例讲的太琐碎了 分析又不够深入 不过总体还是值得一读
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