Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

Lori Gottlieb

出版时间

2019-04-01

ISBN

9781328662057

评分

★★★★★

标签

心理学

书籍介绍

One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.

As Gottlieb explores the inner chambers of her patients' lives -- a self-absorbed Hollywood producer, a young newlywed diagnosed with a terminal illness, a senior citizen threatening to end her life on her birthday if nothing gets better, and a twenty-something who can't stop hooking up with the wrong guys -- she finds that the questions they are struggling with are the very ones she is now bringing to Wendell.

With startling wisdom and humor, Gottlieb invites us into her world as both clinician and patient, examining the truths and fictions we tell ourselves and others as we teeter on the tightrope between love and desire, meaning and mortality, guilt and redemption, terror and courage, hope and change.

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone is revolutionary in its candor, offering a deeply personal yet universal tour of our hearts and minds and providing the rarest of gifts: a boldly revealing portrait of what it means to be human, and a disarmingly funny and illuminating account of our own mysterious lives and our power to transform them.

AI导读
核心看点
  • 双重身份叙事,治疗师与来访者互为镜像
  • 剖析爱、死亡、孤独等人类终极困境
  • 揭示心理治疗并非给建议,而是自我理解
适合谁读
  • 对心理学感兴趣,渴望自我探索的读者
  • 正经历情感危机或人生转折点的迷茫者
  • 希望改善亲密关系,寻求内心和解的人
读前提醒
  • 非专业教材,侧重故事性,节奏较舒缓
  • 需耐心阅读,部分章节可能显得絮叨
  • 建议结合自身经历反思,而非仅看故事
读者共识
  • 文笔流畅真实,极具共情力与治愈感
  • 打破心理病耻感,让人正视内心脆弱
  • 部分读者认为后半段略显冗长自我

本导读基于书籍简介、目录、原文摘录、短评和书评生成,不等同于全文精读。

精彩摘录
  • "When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of e"
  • "没有什么比从痛苦中解脱更令人向往了,也没有什么比丢开依赖更让人害怕了。 ——詹姆斯·鲍德温"
  • "如果你能深入了解某个人,就不可能不对他产生好感。"
  • "这些情景所触发的情绪:理所当然地将自己的不满迁怒于外界,在名为《我无比重要的人生》的现实情景剧中拒绝承担自己的戏份。我了解那种感觉:沉浸在自以为是的愤慨中,坚信自己绝对正确,还觉得受尽了冤枉和委屈"
  • "约翰是在用遮掩和回避的方式处理他的痛苦,我也正在用同样的方法面对我内心的痛苦。"
  • "我知道痛苦总是和丧失紧密相连。但我还知道一些不太容易理解的事情,那就是变化也常常伴随着失去。无所失则不得变,正因如此,人们常常说着要去改变,却依然驻足原地。"
  • "尽管我们的社会在不断开放,一些私密的话题也不再是禁忌,但关于精神层面的挣扎,人们却依然羞于启齿。"
  • "我们几乎可以和任何人讨论我们的生理健康甚至性生活,但只要一提及焦虑或抑郁,或是难以抑制的悲伤,对方看你的表情多半会是:“现在立刻马上,快跳过这个话题。”"
作者简介
Lori Gottlieb is a psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author who writes The Atlantic's weekly "Dear Therapist" advice column. A contributing editor at The Atlantic, she also writes regularly for The New York Times, and has appeared on The Today Show, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, CNN, and NPR. Learn more at LoriGottlieb.com or by following her @LoriGottlieb1 on Twitter.
用户评论
年度最佳的救赎 so so healing
十分之一弃。这个style我们就命名为the wife style吧。一直忍着,想着这么高分一定有点什么可取之处,但是一章接一章的莫名其妙,本世纪仿佛是等不到了。个人理解就是一个therapist把全体读者当自己的therapist的大型dumping现场。(她真的就只是dump,dump完了为了上价值勉强敷衍几句“这个故事教会了我ABC”且通常连BC都没有就一句A)另外强烈推荐豆瓣在想看在看和看过以外增加一个“弃看”,不然我只看了十分之一就打一分还是于心有愧的。
跟Mr.idiot相反,我非常愿意甚至有点儿过度表达自己不愉快的童年,不仅乐意承认它给我造成的伤害甚至会把它作为借口逃避一些不愉快的选择。看这本书很受启发,跟自己和解,更能想明白自己跟爱人的关系,不应该从他身上获取情感,应该是互相分享。跟作者一样,不愿意承认,但隐约还是被年龄在催促担忧焦虑,埋的够深而已。童年的问题要懂得脱敏,要珍惜自己。我以前总觉得找therapist寻求帮助不适合我是因为我不可能信任对方,没法真心袒露,看这本书明白了therapist能把人剥开,是在几乎等于斗争的过程中帮助客户(不是患者),不配合的客户有对应的手段。没看这本书之前我真的没认识到其实年龄的变化给我带来了同样的焦虑,很多时候的懊恼跟做决策的纠结都受那个我之前没听到的声音影响,担心自己经不起折腾了。
听的Audible版,仿佛做了14小时的therapy,深感值回票价。虽然是学心理的但是对therapy满心狐疑的我终于与其和解。
可以帮助您自省的人。Brought me to tears many times.
大概持续了两个月,睡前或周末断断续续读完。中间有很多充满智慧的表达,作者的真诚也很令人感动。最重要的是,一个个人物的鲜活故事,让人共鸣也让人反思。今天在从西伊豆徒步回来的漫漫长路上读完最后的部分。夹在满座的电车里,读到Julie的葬礼和John的自我和解,眼泪和鼻涕几度涌出来,幸好戴着口罩,不至于过分尴尬……
“The only way out is been through.”
We have to accept that life is not perfect. But reading all those stories and feeling that everything eventually fall into their places, I think I might have defined ‘perfection’ wrongly in the first place. Good read of the year. Thank you, Lori!
Enlightening, inspiring stories about facing external uncertainties and internal vulnerabilities. We change via relationships with others. We need to see ourselves truthfully. We are all gonna die.
反思了好多我看心理医生时的情形 在逐渐接受termination啦!我可太爱心理咨询了
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