Healing the Shame that Binds You - John Bradshaw

Healing the Shame that Binds You

John Bradshaw

出版时间

2005-10-15

ISBN

9780757303234

评分

★★★★★
书籍介绍
This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
精彩摘录
  • "High school is the time of puberty. And puberty is a time of feeling intense exposure and vulnerability. Whatever toxic shame a person canies from childhood will be tested in high school."
  • "Our society is highly addictive. We have 60 million sexual abuse victims. Possibly 75 million lives are seriously affected by alcoholism, with no telling how many more through other drugs. We have no idea of the actual impact on our economy resulting from the billions of tax free dollars that come f"
  • "The "Inner Voice" This negative self-talk is the internal dialogue that Robert Firestone calls the "inner voice". The inner voice has been described by others in different ways. Eric referred to it as a set of parental recordings that are like cassette tapes. Some have estimated that there are 25,00"
  • "The unexpected quality of a shaming event creates a lack of self-trust in a child. As toxic shame develops, the child stops trusting his own eyes, judgment, feelings and desires. These faculties form our basic human power. The distrust of our basic faculties results in the feeling of powerlessness. "
  • "汤姆金斯在研究中发现人有9种与生俱来的情感,分别是兴奋、喜悦、惊讶、苦恼(悲伤)、恐惧、愤怒、羞耻、“厌闻”和厌恶。在后3种情感中,羞耻属于辅助情感,就像兴奋和喜悦之间的一道天然边界。如果兴奋或喜悦持续的时间过长或表现过度,羞耻就会发挥作用,阻止这两种情感的继续发展。"
  • "汤姆金斯认为,人的认知、决策和行动发展的最初蓝图都是由情感系统决定。也就是说,汤姆金斯认为,情感(感受)是思维的形式,与决策和行动紧密相关。"
  • "汤姆金斯写道: 我认为情感才是人与生俱来的主要生物动力机制,比剥夺驱动力(drive deprivation)和获得喜悦更紧要,比身体疼痛更紧急。"
  • "以下关于“同性恋大脑”的论述摘自丽塔·卡特出版的《大脑的秘密档案》一书: 1991年,知名杂志《科学》公布了一项研究,这项研究显示一群死于艾滋病的男同性恋者的大脑结构与男异性恋者的不同。相比之下,男同性恋者下丘脑中触发男性典型性行为的核团要小得多,这使其看起来更像女性大脑的核团。这项研究的作者西蒙·列维(Simon LeVay),当时担任索尔克生物研究所副教授、加利福尼亚大学生物学兼职教授。他的研究一经发表立即遭到了同性恋活动家的攻击,他们担心承认同性恋是一种生理疾病可能会导致同性恋被重新污名化。列维本人也是一名同性恋者,经过研究他进一步发现,同性恋者和异性恋者的胼胝体○也有所不同一同性恋者的"
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