"Good Girl conditioning leads to the Smush, which leads to incongruence—an inability to occupy either the submissive or the dominant position completely. The Smush makes it difficult for us to give an instruction or to speak our truths in a way that feels good to the person we’re communicating with. "
"When I’m teaching Turning the Spotlight, I say to the room, “I’m going to ask one of you an uncomfortable question. No matter what: Don’t answer my question. Instead, put your attention out—on me—and ask me one back.” 当我在教《聚光灯下的转身》这门课时,我会对全班同学说:“我要问你们一个让你们感到不舒服的问题。无论什么问题:不要回答我的问题。相反,把你们的注意力放在我身上——然后"
"How We Reward Billy and Mary 我们如何奖励比利和玛丽 I should say up front that I have zero interest in a biological cast on this material; I’m not a scientist here to argue nature versus nurture, and I have absolutely no idea what the fundamental differences are between men and women, if indeed they exist at a"